This is part three of a three-part series examining perceptions of the challenges and opportunities women face in forging a career in the oil patch. The information was collected through a brief e-mail questionnaire with a promise of anonymity for those responding.

The immutable difference between men and women is that women are the ones who can and do bear children. Yet pregnancy is a brief phase of a woman's life. The struggle to balance work and personal life is shared by men and women.
Men cite family issues as a barrier to a woman's advancement in the energy industry:
• "The playing field is as 'level' as it is in most industries. Opportunities are open to anyone willing to put in the hard work and neglect outside life/responsibilities."
• "If a woman made it known that she wanted to start a family and planned to reduce the amount of time she was available for work, management would look for a more workaholic person to assume the high-profile projects."
Many women feel they are condemned regardless of whether they ease up for family reasons or take extended maternity leaves. They may be stigmatized just for having the biological potential. Women observed:
• "The marketplace is so tight that companies will go with people who get results and who don't ask for special considerations, don't disrupt the organization/flow of work or have the potential for disruption (pregnancy), which may be the key problem."
• "Coming from my generation, I saw several women who made conscious decisions to forgo having children, only to realize at age 45 they were not going any higher and had sacrificed much for the wrong outcome."
Women recognize that family issues limit their careers:
• "The amount of work expected of each individual has increased tremendously as the industry has laid off almost half of the workers. This increase in workload puts pressure on individuals to work longer hours to accomplish their goals. There is little sympathy for family needs."
• "Many women's careers stagnate with diminishing responsibility after she has requested a maternity leave, especially if she has had more than one child with extended leaves within a 3- to 5-year span. The perception among management is that she is not focusing on her career or taking it as seriously."
Men may not recognize the price women pay over the duration of their careers. One man wrote, "The big challenge will be for companies to treat women and men either exactly the same, or admit that differences exist and tackle them head on. Unfortunately, the burden will be on the women. If a man took a paternity leave of 3 months, he'd have a black mark on his career. However, if a woman wants 3 months off, it's perfectly acceptable, and managers bend over backwards for the working mother. These same managers look down on men who would like the same opportunities (job sharing, time off, flexible work schedules). While this isn't the woman's problem, it will have spinoff that won't benefit them. Men will always feel that women get special treatment unless it's an equal culture."
Women recognize that in taking time for family, they trade career advancement for other goals. Women responded:
• "If I choose not to work 65 to 70 hours a week because I want to maintain other activities, I accept that the 'juicy' management position probably will go to someone else. If I choose not to gain experience in a field or operations position because of health considerations, I accept that I am not qualified for certain management positions."
• "I have been in the industry 11 years. The next 5 to 10 years will probably be critical to my career progression. A year ago my circumstances changed, and I now need to take into account my partner's career aspirations and job restrictions. I also would like to start a family in the next few years and do not want to have to short-change my family time. It will be very difficult to balance all commitments, and from talking to my peer group, it will probably be the career that takes the back seat. Some women completely exit the workplace at this point in their careers. This seems such a waste of talent, experience and investment for the companies involved."
Some men congratulate women on their determination of what is really meaningful in life. One man wrote, "Women have made career choices that usually have been more balanced (consideration of personal interests and family as well as financial vs. upward mobility). For the most part, I have truly admired the choices that career women have made. The decisions were made for all of the right reasons."
Even more encouraging, some men recognize that clock time does not equal productivity. A man has found, "Most companies and employees are not very flexible. It is an inconvenience to make room for a person to return from the workforce after a break or to make a spot for a 3-day-a-week person. The perceived inconvenience is allowed to override the benefit of having a motivated, focused and dedicated person who really wants to be back on the job. My experience is that when we brought a person back for 3 days, we usually got 4 or 5 equivalent days of results from the person."
Ironically, it may be more difficult for a woman who worked through her children's early years to get her career back on track than for a woman who took a leave of absence. If her company cannot see her potential beyond the period of reduced effort, when she is ready to devote more effort to work, a woman may have to switch jobs to get ahead.
To leverage diversity, corporations need to recognize that people's careers are nonlinear for many reasons, including childbirth. Companies would be wise to periodically take off their blinders and reassess the potential of all their underused human capital, not just women. Job-posting systems, which allow people to self-nominate, combined with open-minded assessment would help everyone break out of straightjacket career stereotyping. Selection processes that are limited to fast-trackers will miss many capable candidates who could bring more experience and sensitivity to the job.
Generally, there are many candidates who can do a job. Having a sponsor step forward and champion you is what makes the difference. A man advised, "Women should appreciate the need to cultivate (male and female) mentors and supporters. These areas are and always have been important."
Men recognize that finding mentors and sponsors is more difficult for women than men:
• "We still have a very male-dominated industry. Senior positions have been the domain of men for a variety of nicely rationalized reasons. The rationalizations have had little to do with contributions or skill, but mostly due to the fear that 'men could not act like men' with women around, and that women could not be depended upon to be there when you need them."
• "Why are there so few women in senior management positions in the oil industry? Because there were already people there before them who, being male, relate to males more readily and disproportionately pass power on to those they are most comfortable with."
Women's comments show that they are painfully aware of the difficulties:
• "The industry still has many 'good ol' boys' who run the business. They respect women, but women have no credibility with them, and they don't see the difference."
• "On the whole, most women (and minorities) are just not 'wired' into their companies the same way men are. The more one's skills and experience put you into any visible or leadership role, the more vulnerable you become, and the more you need a network to protect you. Women just don't have the kind of personal relationships with the 'right' people in their companies that can withstand much pressure. Men are very savvy about knowing how little their colleagues will stick their necks out for each other, much less a woman or minority."
• "Men in top management have very close relationships. Such relationships are very difficult to have with a woman. Very few men can handle such close relationships with women without getting into trouble."
Sexual liaisons between rapidly promoted women and their male sponsors have been tolerated in companies large and small. Discussions of these liaisons and associated implications that women sleep their way to the top hurt serious businesswomen. In an organization that tolerates sexual favors, innocent women and their platonic sponsors are apt to be smeared with false suspicions. Zero tolerance of business favors for personal liaisons would create an atmosphere more conducive to business-focused mentoring and sponsorship.
Unlike their male peers, women can't get ahead by mimicking the men above them. Women said:
• "Two individuals, one a man and the other a woman, with the same personality features will be perceived and treated in a different manner."
• "If you are a strong, smart male landman, you are considered to be appropriately assertive; but if you are a smart, strong female landman, you are considered to be unpleasantly aggressive."
• "I've learned to let people discover that I'm a good reservoir engineer rather than fight to gain that recognition. It is best to not make a big deal out of demanding respect. I gain respect more quickly if I allow people to come to their own conclusions."
Memories are long if women show too much emotion or aggression. To advance, women may need to change employers. Companies are better able to recognize female talent in another organization since they see the woman's capability untainted by the bad impressions created during the learning process.
Females who have battled their way through male-dominated organizations may view themselves as tokens and other women as competition for a limited number of women-allocated positions. The trailblazers also may fear that if a unit in the company has many women, it will be regarded as a female ghetto with consequent loss of prestige and compensation.
Women must move beyond jealously guarding their places as tokens. Taking a neutral position with regard to other women is not sufficient. Women in management must be willing to act as champions for other women.
The game is two-sided. Even if a woman believes she is being discriminated against, she must not develop a bad attitude. Almost everyone attributes career frustration to some form of discrimination. As one man said, "It is just human nature to blame the easiest potential reason other than yourself."
Discrimination is a statistical issue, and for our individual careers we are looking after a single person. That means maintaining a positive attitude and working on what is under our control. All of us can improve our technical performance and people skills. If we are willing to take risks, we create additional opportunities to demonstrate that we have the right stuff.
As one woman wrote, "Women need to move forward from thinking that men are their enemies."
My experience is that the best people to work with and for are those who are confident of their own capabilities and worth. Women need to have good technical and managerial skills along with a strong network and sponsors so that they can move forward with confidence.

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